Can't sleep

Mainly because I have ear ache and also because my mind is in over drive. My husband and I are not talking. Not in a bad way ... not all. In a good way actually . If not talking can ever be good. We have made a joint decision. A big decision. And we both know what that decision means but neither of us are brave enough to say it out loud. Because then it becomes real. I'm happy , he's happy , we are both excited even. But we seem unable to tell each other. To make it real. Other people won't be happy. They'll think we are crazy. So we pretend we are not even thinking about it. We discuss related topics , we make important decisions, we are joyful. And yet we don't speak. Very very odd! This being a grown up malarky is HARD!